Death Metal

Choosing Death: The Improbable History of Death Metal and Grindcore is recommended reading for anyone who found themselves listening to a lot of Morbid Angel and Deicide while teenagers and scaring the hell out of their parents (like me.) Oh, how I miss those days…

Now, though…I find death metal obscenely boring. Sure, I’ve been listening to a lot of Morbid Angel lately, but I find death metal to be largely unmoving, especially the new stuff. Death metal is a teenage thing, and will always be a teenage thing. I’m okay with that.

It’s not like I’m not listening to heavy music: quite the opposite, actually. I’ve never been more interested in heavy music than I am now. The new school grind bands, like Nasum and Pig Destroyer, absolutely fucking RULE. Grand Magus is the new king of doom, and the newest (and sadly, last) Dissection record is unstoppable. Arch Enemy, Melechesh, anything from Rise Above records…yes, I’ll take it all.

But death metal…death metal kind of sucks, you know? Akercocke is okay, Incantation has a fierce new album out, and the new Lost Soul is pretty awesome. But on whole, I prefer the old stuff: Entombed, Carcass, Bolt Thrower, At The Gates. You know, the shit. Where else can it go, really?

-Josh

Generation I

I just want to point out that it is the mashup of Goth and the self-centered attitude of American Culture that brought about the fad of Emo, and an entire culture I am calling “Generation I” as in, “I-Me-My”.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p95_eF3bD1w

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6AbIFnJ0f8

The Poor, Poor Emo kids! They just need your attention/unconditional love/aeropostale gift certificates! I mean, they just want you to notice them and their asymetrical haircuts! They just wanna be loved! They just wanna scream to the world, “What about MEEEEEEE!”

Fucking whiners. Kill yourselves and rid us of your self-absorbed stupidity. Maybe you wouldn’t be so depressed if you quit listening to shitty music like Dashboard Confessional…

Conrad Zero LogoYours Darkly,

Conrad Zero

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Video of Police Shutting Down Jagged Spiral Jam

We’ve always said that nothing can stop Jagged Spiral, but the other day we found something that did:

The Police Department.

To facilitate some carpet cleaning, Monday’s practice was moved from the basement to the garage, and it was obvious that we would be heard, but it was just for one time, and our practice session was to be short; from 5 till 8 PM, although the noise ordinance does not require us to turn down until 10PM.

We didn’t touch a single song on Days From Evil, instead making use of the practice to do a quick run through the new song Bad Kitty and to do more creative and structural work on two new songs, which are currently called Dragonslayer and Horrorcloud. (You will have to ask Colin about where “Horrorcloud” came from, I think it has to do with Pizza Luce’s Garlic Mashed Potato Pizza and his digestive system.)

We were totally rocking, the song structure for the songs was really gelling, and the Jagged Spiral Music Train got rolling, and then…

7PM

Knock, knock.

The music stopped. It was my neighbor, an older woman who keeps a very nice lawn. I don’t know her name. Um, she’s from two houses down the block.

“Hello?”

“Hi, I just wanted to let you know we were just listening to you guys play, and I wanted to tell you, we Love your music!”

“Really?”

“Hell yeah! That band, the one that does that song ‘Iron Man’, you know the one?”

“Kind of.”

“You sound just like them!”

“Really?”

“Yeah! Anyways, we were just outside listening to you play, and had to come over and let you know we hope you will keep playing?”

“Really?”

“All summer long! That would be great!”

“Um, thanks.”

Strange. Of course, Colin and Josh heard the whole exchange, and were thrilled. New fans! Oh well, don’t let it go to your head. We picked up the reigns and started off again, the avalanche of music was building to a cresendo, nothing could stop it….

7:30PM

Knock, knock.

It was the police.

I’m not sure I would have accurately remembered the next couple minutes, being pulled from THE ZONE back into reality so quickly. Thankfully we had the videocamera running the entire time, and the police officer was kind enough to step right into the frame as though we had planned the whole thing:

Turns out the sound ordinance also has some nonsense about sounds being detectable within 50 feet. News to me. Guess I’m gonna have to look that one up.

Conrad Zero LogoYours Darkly,

Conrad Zero

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Jagged Spiral Concert Ends In Tragedy

This is what happened at our Seattle Concert last week. I told Josh to dial it back a bit, but he wouldn’t listen and unleashed the Drums of Doom:

We had a great time, and fortunately no one was hurt (Since no one was actually in the audience.) Unfortunately, we are not allowed back to Seattle and our accountant is still sorting out the damages. Our lawyers are still trying to determine whether our performance can be considered an act of terrorism.

Conrad Zero LogoYours Darkly,

Conrad Zero

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couldn't have said it better myself

I just love the manic intensity of some of the stuff on Lefsetz. It’s nice to know that there are people out there who still care, and those people and I apparently share similar viewpoints. (Seriously, I was thinking of writing a very similar post before I heard of this one!)

http://lefsetz.com/wordpress/index.php/archives/2007/04/18/sam-cutler-on-live-earth/

So there ya go.

Horns up!

-josh

10 Failed Tech Trends of 2005

Interesting article in an old Extreme Tech issue. By interesting, I mean more than a little galling.

http://www.extremetech.com/article2/0,1697,1906395,00.asp

It’s amazing how much contempt people actually have for “average Americans.” On the one hand, you have the writer pointing to the consumer as THE arbiter in all things tech, as in noting that we (the consumer) don’t want multiple standards. This is absolutely true: when I buy a DVD, or a laptop, I want the thing to Just Work; it’s why people are still buying Apple Computers. The things Just Work.

On the other hand, this constant harping on the public’s inability to “understand” what “good audio” is absolutely insulting. It’s like this: people don’t care. They just don’t. People don’t want “high fidelity” sound because the sound they have is good enough.

Does vinyl sound better than CD? Arguably. Do CDs sound better than mp3s? If the mp3 is ripped at a low bitrate, sure. At 160 kbps or above, does it really matter? Stop for a minute and listen to your surroundings; it’s probably pretty loud. Is that extra dynamic range really gonna make much of a difference on your evening commute, sitting next to a cattle truck on 494? Not really.

It’s not that I don’t care; as I guy who is into all things audio, I want my music and movies to sound great. That they don’t is lamentable. But don’t blame the technology, and don’t blame the public. Blame the people producing all of that crass, relentlessly mediocre material, and the executives who have so much contempt for their audience that they’re convinced that’s what we really want.

-josh

The Stick of Destiny

The Entire Jagged Spiral Crew (And 2/3 of our fans) went to First Avenue last night for the Celtic Frost / Type O Negative show. There was an opening band, but unfortunately we got there just as they ended.

After a refreshing frisk at the doorway, we proceeded upstairs where we could get our drink on. When the sound check started for Celtic Frost, we descended to the mosh pit.

I don’t know about you-all, but I learned long ago that I do not pay $22 to hide near the coat check, or hang near the womens’ restroom to oogle. I can go do that for free at Barnes and Noble in Maple Grove. The quality isn’t nearly as good, but you get what you pay for…but I digress.

Anyway, I don’t fear the mosh pit, especially not here in Minnesota. So we stood in the center of the crowd when Celtic Frost opened up, and held our ground until the end of their set.

They were Loud. They were Tight. They were ON. These guys have been playing for YEARS. Celtic Frost was popular with skaters back in the 80’s fer chrissake. They were scary. They wore face paint, and they made KISS look like a bunch of pussies. I could easily imagine any of them dismembering fans and roadies alike backstage as a warmup for the show. Especially the bass player.  [shiver]

The band finished, and the drummer threw his drumsticks into the mosh pit. One of the sticks bounced off at least three outstretched hands before rolling to at stop at the feet of…

Josh.

I’m telling you that stick went to him, like he was meant to have it.

He did not pick it up right away. He looked around first, as the room went silent, and the eyes of the entire crowd watched to see what he would do. Then as gracefully as King Arthur pulling Excalibur from the stone, Josh picked up the drumstick that had pounded a ringing into our ears for the last hour (My ears are still ringing as I write this blog post.)

I did a quick check of all the available exits, and prepared myself for impending Moshpit Hogpile of Doom sure to follow, but no one made a move. Suddenly, we were saved by the house music and the video of Seth Green’s show where he plays with dolls. Everyone’s eyes glazed over and were pulled to the pretty lights on the big video screen, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

I might always regret not thinking to track down the person with the other drumstick and seeing if they would part with it or sell it…

Type-O Negative was next, and the intro to their show was quite rude. It started with extremely loud polka music (The Chicken Dance, in fact) which was REALLY loud. That lasted forever, and just when I thought I couldn’t stand any more, they lowered the music, and someone walked out on stage. The crowd started to cheer…

…and it was a fucking roadie. Then the lights came back up, and the loud polka music, now even

This was almost funny once, but they proceeded to repeat this joke several times.

[Note to self: Never EVER do this. Not Even Once. It is rude to the audience. The audience is why you are on stage. If you hate your audience that much, then simply don’t go on tour.]

Eventually, Type-O Negative actually came out on stage, and we once again held our ground at the edge of the mosh pit. A few times we got sucked into the swirling void of flailing bodies, (and I got punched in the nose by an underaged girl. I’m assuming it was an accident) There were plenty of other attractions and distractions in the moshpit, but mostly Type-O Negative was shiny, high-goth metallic.

After the show, Josh pointed out that Type-O Negative on stage sounded Exactly like Type-O Negative on their latest album, Dead Again, and there endeth the lesson.

Conrad Zero LogoYours Darkly,

Conrad Zero

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The Birth of “Bad Kitty”

Practice today went well. It was the first practice with my new bass, and I couldn’t be happier. The tone is great, and it plays like buttah. After a couple hours of fighting the Dragon, my hand would need a break, but a couple straight hours with the new bass and I couldn’t even tell. Typing is more strenous than playing this bass. It’s wonderful to have a quality piece of equipment in the studio.

We started off with Bullets and Forced Entry (Since they are in the same tuning) then moved on to Hallowed Ground. While we are getting progressively better, it seems the longer we practice in each session, the worse we get. I suggested we practice LESS often.

After practicing, we worked on a new song, which came into some semblance of a shape, with a defined verse/chorus/bridge. After roughing in the structure, we recorded a couple passes of it. Then I presented some scat vocals I had been bellowing in the car, not much more than a melody, but some lines that kept repeating in my head.

We recorded the scat melody, and then Eleven presented some lyrics he had worked up when the song existed in another key. We opened up another track (Because Tracks Are Free you know). He recorded a rough of his vox , during which he ad-libbed some verses, including the line “Bad Kitty” which really clicked.

Whether the lyrics stay or not, the combination of “Bad Kitty” and “Wicked Tongue” will seed the theme of the song, and the rest of the lyrics, and no doubt get us into significant trouble with our significant others.

I did some reverb and compression on the mix, then burned it to CD. The vocal pieces seemed to layer pretty well, and I will review our work during my daily commute. Hopefully more lyrics will rise up from the chaos…

The song really pulled together quickly, only three sessions and we have rough outline of a real song. Scary.

Conrad Zero LogoYours Darkly,

Conrad Zero

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