Recently I attended the Best New Bands of 2010 at First Ave. One thing I couldn’t help noticing was the number of drummers replaced by fucking mac laptops. Now I know laptops are lighter, easier to work with, drink less (far less), and are more reliable (far more reliable) than real drummers.  But if that’s the case, why stop there? Aren’t laptops more reliable than any musician? So why not replace the bassist, guitarist, keyboardist and singer with laptops too!

In fact, you could replace them all with one laptop! Just think of all the advantages:

• The show will take up very little space. No need for a stage! More space for people to stand, so you can sell more tickets!
• All band members would arrive at the exact same time, ready to go.
• The show will sound exactly like the mp3.
• Cleanup is a snap.

But why stop with just the band? Computers are more reliable than anyone, so let’s replace the audience with computers too! Hell, just stick a laptop on the dancefloor, point its webcam at the laptop on the stage, and the benefits grow exponentially:

• No more time wasted on getting ready for the show! The audience can enjoy the show in the comfort of their own homes wearing easy clothes!
• Less fossil fuels wasted by all those people traveling to the club!
• Drinks are much cheaper!
• No more D.U.I.’s!

I think I’ve made my point. Get a real person to play the percussion, or get off the fucking stage. At least have someone pretend to be talented and trigger the sequencer. I saw Crystal Method live, and watching two fat guys turning knobs is about the least fun I’ve ever had at at live show. It’s a tiny step above a CD listening party, but at least there’s someone making the music in front of you.

Pressing Play onstage is fine… if you’re audience is blind and deaf. Otherwise, it sucks. I go to clubs to SEE artists make music. I go to shows to HEAR an original, immediate work of art. If I wanted to push play, I’d have saved the cover charge and pushed play on my mp3 player.

While Jagged Spiral has never toured further than South Minneapolis, this article by Chris Howorth of the metal band In This Moment is chock-full of tips for touring musicians.

If the Spiral ever hits the road, I’ll be sure to bring the Gold Bond Powder…

We’re pleased as punch that Jagged Spiral Incorporated has been listed at Hot Frog.  Apparently, our products and services are classified as “Heavy Metals”! Isn’t that nice!

As much as I’d love to thank the brainless meatstick who put this together, its no doubt the work of a scraper site, pulled together by a computer simply to waste space on the internet.

Thankfully, a Google Search for Jagged Spiral still turns up the truth.

Meanwhile a quick search on the owner of Hot Frog turns up a piece of trash called Reed Business Information, providers of Variety Magazine, Asia Food Journal and many other periodicals that kill trees, weigh down your mail-carrier, and clog up your mailbox and recycle bin.

Sorry, Reed Business Information, but our Publicity Policy clearly states that we have to point out Weapons-Grade Fucknuttery when we see it.

PS: Thanks to our good friend Saveau for the stellar classification of “Weapons-Grade Fucknuttery”, we’ll be using that one A LOT here at jaggedspiral.com

Seems other bands are beginning to realize what Jagged Spiral knew a long time ago: the recording industry is dead, and Do-It-Yourself is the new Black.

Before bands were only seeing their music as a ‘product’ something that they ‘sold’. But not anymore. Bands like Jagged Spiral, NIN, Radiohead, and Atmosphere have broken the paradigm: they front all the costs themselves: engineering, production, mastering, duplication, graphics, packaging, etc…  They have a pro-quality ‘product’, but they give it away for free.

This article on TorrentFreak points out that artists are catching on. They are realizing that the possibility of popularity is more likely than the possibility they can sell one-thousand CDs.  They drop their music on bittorrent and other file-sharing clients in the hopes of publicity (which is free) versus advertising (which costs $$$$).

This is great news for fans of real music. Leave the music industry behind for suckas who will gladly pay $18 for the latest piece of over-hyped, over-processesed, under-talented garbage. Dive into myspace, torrent and band websites to find the real thing . Music that the creators care about, and gatekeepers-be-damned.

What do you think? Is this behavior undercutting the perceived value of music?  Will the internet drown in a deluge of crap-rock? Is this empowering artists to usher in a Renaissance of music? Drop your comments below.

Jagged Spiral doesn’t generally do product endorsements, but sometimes something comes along that surprises us with its simplicity and moxie. Things like that warrant public approval, especially when all three of us are in agreement.

At the Apocalyptica concert last April, Jagged Spiral discovered the Jag-bomb. (Pronounced Yag-Bom) At least, I only remember having two.

Jag Bombs have been around for a while now. For those not in college, a Jag-Bomb is a combination of Jagermeister and Red Bull.

I know what half of you are about to say. “Are you Insane? Mixing something that makes people Fight with something that gives people Energy?” The other half were going to say, “Are you Insane? Mixing something that tastes like Cough Syrup with something that tastes like Radioactive Camel Urine?”

Agreed on both counts, however, there is some strange co-mingling of effects and flavors with the two ingredients, and the end result is less undesirable than you would expect.

The drink is an interesting dichotomy of emotional directions, much like Jagged Spiral’s music. Therefore, we are announcing that the Official Drink of Jagged Spiral is the Jag-Bomb. If you ever come see us live, [Editors Note: Like at the July 11th CD Release party for example…] try one out, it will definitely put a unique spin on your perception of our live sound…